Your Brain Only Knows What You Tell It!
Monday,
Monday…another new week, a new beginning; a new adventure! Welcome to Coffee
Hour @ Chicklit Power and Monday’s Mantra @ Trench Classes United. Oh, I can’t
wait to share this true story with you about fear. Come on in.
A couple of
weeks ago, my husband and I took our seven-year-old grandson to the water park
in our city. We definitely wanted to get wet and cool off but we just didn’t
want to drive all that way to the beach. We gave him a description of the water
slides, assuring him it would be fun, appeasing his curiosity. I had never been
on them, but hey, they have always looked fun! He was so excited. Oh, the joy
of a child! I wish I could bottle it and pour it on myself when he goes home.
When we got
there, there was a bit of a hike to the ticket window but we made it! The guy
in the booth asked if we were swimming and sliding, or just swimming. “Just swimming
for me,” little Bryden said. I was dumbfounded. “You don’t want to go on the
slides, buddy?” No, I’m good.” We paid for our swim tickets and the young guy
gave us a couple of slide chips and said have him try it and if he likes it,
then we’ll upgrade your ticket. What a
nice guy, I thought.
We walked
toward the beach area and set up our stuff while he jumped into the water, and
within seconds he made a couple of new friends. Oh, the innocence of a child
that thrusts them into others’ spaces. He can be so joyfully bossy and
rambunctious at times and some people just don’t get him!J
George
pulled out the water guns and within minutes people on the shore were laughing
with us as we aimed at each other and within minutes, we went from dry and hot
to wet and cool. After little B got bored with that, we decided to try the
water slides –or should I say George decided that I should try them with
B. We raced to the first set of stairs
and came to a stop. He looked at me with his brown eyes full of a familiar
emotion, fear. “Nana, I don’t want to go on it; it’s too high.” I told him Nana
was a bit scared too, but I was going to face my fear and have some fun with
him.
I managed to
keep him engaged in conversation all the way up to when it was time for me to
go – they didn’t allow two to go at once. I assured him that Nana wouldn’t let
him do something that would hurt him and told him I’d be waiting at the bottom
to catch him. Off I went!
I discovered
that the more I sat upright, the slower I went. I was like my own sled, in
charge of the speed, and as the end of the slide drew near, I leaned back a bit
to pick up the speed and…splash! The little girl in me laughed out loud! And
then I waited and waited and waited. I knew in my gut he had decided not to
slide down.
I got out
and got halfway up the path and there he was, looking defeated with big
crocodile tears in his eyes. “What happened, B?” “It’s too high,” he exclaimed.
I stood with him for moments that stretched to the height of the long and
twisty slide and then I pointed to it, assuring him that it wasn’t any higher than
the height of the garage door that he hangs on to as it’s going up! J Yes, he really does that! “The top
of it is higher,” he pointed. “Yeah, but not by much, buddy,” I countered back.
We stood
there in silence until I turned to go back toward our chairs. “No,” he
screamed. “Okay, let’s go try it,” and I headed back up and he followed.
So up again
we went and this time he actually started to sit down and then freaked out and
stood up and declared he was too scared. The walk back to our chairs was one
I’ll never forget. His fear was so real, so overwhelming, it had him all worked
up, so worked up that when he said these words, I couldn’t help but smile –
inside, of course because I’d never want him to think I was smiling at him. He
said: “I wanna do it; it’s just I’m soooooo scared,” he whined, tears beginning
to stream down his little sweet face.
“It’s okay,
Buddy. If you don’t want to do it, that’s okay. You don’t have to.” I kept
reassuring him all the way back to our beach chairs, but it just wasn’t sitting
right with him. We got back to George and within 30 seconds, he had papa
convinced he’d try it again if only he had the tokens because I had already
used one. So he and papa went and talked to the guy at the ticket window and
they came back with two more tokens. He convinced me he was going to do it this
time. We raced toward the slides.
This time,
when we got to the hill that began the ascent toward the slide, and he started
to give into his fears again, I stopped him and I bent down and looked him
right in his beautiful brown eyes and said: “B, your brain only knows what you
tell it. If you continue to repeat that you’re scared, guess what? By the time
you get up there, you’ll have scared yourself out of the slide. So beginning
with the first step on the stairs I want you to repeat: I’m gonna do this; I
can do this; I’m gonna do this; I can do this.”
When I felt
his voice disappearing, I reminded him to talk a little louder so he could hear
himself. As we climbed up the final steps to the platform of the slide, he
tried to give in again but this time I cut him off, reminding him of his new message.
We were up next and I really thought he was going to go first, but he begged me
to go first. As I sat down, I turned around and said, “Pinky promise you’ll
come right behind Nana.” “I promise.” And down I went…needing to tell myself a
new message, like he will do it; he’s gonna do it! J
I landed
with a happy splash and within seconds I turned to begin to get out and who
came splashing down…that’s right, my little B!
Coffee Hour
friends, fears are frustrating, and when we give in to them they can be
incredibly overwhelming. Maybe it’s time to remember that we can take the power
out of fear by Facing Everything And Rising…instead of Fleeing Everything And Running!
Fearlessly,
Evinda
