I just love
how faithful our God is in teaching us the most beautiful things in the midst
of sorrow or great tribulation. Grab your coffee and you’re in for a treat
today as Breanna shares again from her heart.
Listen,
being transparent isn’t easy. It means having to admit your daily flaws and
struggles but I have found that by doing this I am keeping myself accountable.
Now let me follow that up with a nice little story.
Since
my daddy passed away, A LOT, I mean A LOT has changed (duh, right?) I went and
got treatment and when I came home my whole world got twisted even more upside
down. My family was going in all sorts of directions and I couldn’t emotionally
keep up. I grew sad and bitter. My family and I have grown apart, in large part
due to me not agreeing with choice decisions and feeling hurt, left out.
This
past week, I was talking to one of my best friends, Krystin -- she is such a
genuine soul, someone whom I trust and respect -- I was telling her my hurts
and she’s always so good to listen and she will give advice when she feels
necessary. Well this particular day was no different. I was venting and telling
her what I’ve been feeling convicted about in certain situations, especially as
it relates to the relationships with my family.
Well,
this life change that my family and I are going through and the chaos that’s
transpired through the last couple of months has been exhausting. So I’m
talking to her on the phone and I tell her, “Krys, Im really trying and I don’t
know why I’m still feeling a sense of anger and distance.”
What
she said was truly a game changer for me! She says, “ Im going to ask this and
i don’t want you to get upset with me, but do you feel like if you forgive and
move forward that you will be essentially no longer loyal to your father? If
your father was alive would he approve of the way you and your family are acting?”
BOOM!!!!!
Does
she know me or what? I was so stuck in making sure I was loyal to my daddy,
that I had his back and that was causing me to not be able to forgive and move
forward. And when I think of my dad’s approval about all of our behavior, the
answer is no, my dad would not approve of the way things have been in my family
lately.
So
I pray that the Lord continues to soften my heart to help me stay as transparent
as possible so I am kept accountable and grow in a positive direction.
Transparency
is sliding aside the curtains of the soul, revealing its character. It is not
easy or quick to do if there have been many years, many scars, many fears that
stand in the way.
The
idea that the truth will set us free is an outcome of transparency. Working
towards transparency might be better done with someone that can be trusted.
Exposing the darkness will require a trusted relationship so that the surfacing
of the negatives can be done safely and without repercussions.
Transparency
allows one to shift from hiding behind pretense to genuine living.
2 Timothy 2:15: Do your best to present yourself to
God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling
the word of truth.
Learning,
and unlearning
Breanna
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