Nana Holds: The End (for now)

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Ah, it’s great to be with you today, to take a break from it all and return to this place where I can share the beginning of the end of this season of Nana Holds. Grab your coffee and come on in and get a front-row seat at the tug-of-wars that began not long after John came home.

Did I mention that before John came home, he did announce that Jenel was “the one”? Is it any wonder they wanted to begin to mold into that family unit? Their desire to become a family, though not yet married, pulled on our heartstrings, as well as our common sense. As parents, and as Johnny’s guardian, we needed to see consistency, stability and that can only happen in time and not just for our sake’s but, more so, for Johnny’s.

Sure, we believed that John believed that Jenel was the one he wanted to spend his life with. There was nothing we could really do about this emotional connection that had formed under the pain of his circumstances. His circumstances were not the best of circumstances for a serious relationship to begin and there were things that we knew about –things that they didn’t know we knew about -- that made it critical for them to take more time to get to know one another in order to confirm some things that were uncertain and hazy at best.

As I look back on those first tugs in this tug-of-war that would change everyone’s world, I wish I had tugged more non-emotionally, with less pride, and with a Christ-like meekness that would have helped them to let go of the rope because of understanding, not necessarily agreement. But they were blinded by their need to be together and I was so taken aback by the unexpected tugs, I lost my emotional balance for a while. How could this be happening? Why is this happening? Why couldn’t they see there were still so many loose ends that needed tying, so to speak, messes to clean up, chapters to close so they could start fresh . . .

But they were blinded by their need to be together, and hence the pulls continued.

I am getting the red light on this series, which means I have to put it down for a while but before I do, let me explain, for the benefit of those involved as well as any other reader who may be offended by what I’m writing: My heart’s desire is not to point out anybody else’s stuff, but to stay in my lane, work on my stuff transparently and to respond to life with the tools He has given me, to hopefully speak into the lives of those who have had to parent their children’s children and encourage them in what is often a difficult journey. So please don’t stop coming to coffee hour because I know one day He will give me permission to pick it up again and finish writing this true life story!

Evinda

Nana holds . . . in her heart