Nana Holds

Thanks for joining me today for Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power. I know it can be difficult to stop and take a break and tune it all out, but it’s good to feed your soul so you can keep going and wearing all the hats you wear, girlfriend! Grab your coffee and come on in.

The next memorable thing that happened, albeit not necessarily a good one, is the conversation we had with bio mom’s parents after the court hearing. We boldly stated that they were more than welcome to come and visit Bryden in our home but he would not be going on any overnights with them until the Court determined visitation. We explained that their daughter requested this because of his alcoholism and her mom’s struggle with depression, self-medicating and pot smoking.

Okay. I just heard a little warning signal. Please know I’m not bringing all this out to bash them in any way; Lord knows I’ve had my share of junk that He has helped me unpack and is still unpacking. This is part of the story, and part of what we are up against. When people are in their diseases and bondages, they don’t even know they are! It is what it is and being Bry’s temporary guardians, we need to protect him as much as possible from the baggage so he doesn’t wind up packed in it!

I was the one who got to break the news to them, actually him because he kept blowing up my phone. I remember being very matter-of-fact, and as he verbally bashed his daughter, I reminded him it was their fight, not ours. One of the last things I told him was, I believed God could use this to bring healing to their relationship, to build a bridge that had broken down by all their physical confrontations and verbal beatings that would scar for a lifetime if left inside and not surrendered and forgiven.

Well, that conversation went over about as good as a fart in church! Bio mom was happy but her parents were like bees swarming around someone upsetting their nest. About two weeks later, we were served with papers. They had hired an attorney to gain visitation rights that would be appearing for them at our court hearing on September 24th!

Join me tomorrow for more drama . . .

Smiling inside,

Evinda

Nana Holds

Thanks for joining me today for more of this life-changing series, Nana Holds. At least it’s changing my life and I pray that if there are any other nanas out there entrusted to care for their grandchild or grandchildren that they would be greatly encouraged through these words. Grab your coffee and come on in. We were at our first court appearance but we are not alone.

Though the courthouse is anything but unfamiliar to me, the thought of being on the other side of the bench was not a comforting one. Being in the court-reporting chair and being at counsel’s table before the court is definitely two different experiences! But let me tell you what happens before we get there.

I was trying to think of a name to give Bryden’s mom out of respect for her privacy and the first thing I thought of was BM for biological mom, but I better not do that because it could also stand for something else and that wouldn’t be very nice:)  We’ll just call her bio mom.

She came toward us and was very cordial. She seemed a bit anxious, as we all were, but nothing out of the ordinary.

What was somewhat out of the ordinary is the amenable attitude towards us, considering the situation. I mean, we are literally saying we don’t believe she should get custody of her son so I’m sure you can imagine how awkward it was, or at least could have been.

But she seemed to have sanity wrapped around her, at least for the days surrounding this process, and as the Court questioned her, she responded, and quite confidently, that considering the circumstances, and in light of where she was living — she was staying with her grandma who lives in a seniors only apartment complex and no children are allowed — the best place for her son to be was with us. “However, she said, I do have a declaration I’d like to file in rebuttal.”

I could tell the Court was trying to hide her disregard for bio mom’s ignorance of court rules and procedures as she looked up and matter-of-factly replied, “Then I suggest you get it filed according to the rules of Court before the next court date because I can’t look at it until it is.”

I turned my head to hide my internal smirk that I just know was about to bust outward and then looked back again as the Court declared: “This court awards temporary guardianship of Bryden Lepins to George and Kim Lepins. The next court date to establish permanent guardianship is September 24th. Thank you very much.”

I turned to George and he and I smiled at the irony of the court date. We would be appearing before Her Honor on my husband’s birthday!

Join me Wednesday for more of Nana Holds.

Rejoicing,

Evinda



P.S. Join me and Steve today at www.blogtalkradio.com/Chicklit-Power for more on breaking free from co-dependency!

Nana Holds

Thanks so much for joining me today for a little break at Coffee Hour with Chicklit Power. I hope your year is off to a great start. As for mine, well, I’m already seat-belted in because it started with a couple of jolts, but that’s for a different day! Grab your coffee and come on in.

There were several little God-prints in the paperwork process, like getting all of his mommy’s information, but we had a little help from family in the CPS system! It still amazes me as I look back on it all how smooth it all went. Anyway, after the paperwork was completed, and served on all parties, including his mommy, we waited with bated breath for her phone call.

And before I tell you about that phone call, I must rewind a bit and share some powerful history. See, this person was number 2 on my unlovable list and moved up to the prize-winning number 1 spot when my mother passed just two years ago. And she’s remained my number 1; at least she remained my number 1 at least up through this point in time. We had several conflicts which I struggled to resolve Christ-like, and for the most part, I think I did okay, though I am certain there was/is room for improvement.

Getting back to the phone call, the person who called us was not the same person we had dealt with in months past – did I mention in the past, and her parents confirmed this, she was diagnosed with a personality disorder? I’m so not saying that to bash her, either. She’s not who or what God created her to be. So suffice it to say, I’m never sure who I’m going to be dealing with. She was a bit contrite, definitely combative and defensive, which is her normal persona. She was also incredibly amenable to the idea of George and I being Bry’s guardians. Trust me, that was not the message she was giving at the very beginning of this nightmare turned beautiful!

We hung up the phone somewhat amazed, and then realized that change of heart did not come from anything we did but had to have been from God above who works in mysterious and sovereign ways. Her whole agreeing to our guardianship was yet another confirmation that we were doing what He was calling us to do and not only that, He was in it, all around it and guiding us through it! We weren’t alone and He would continue to equip us!

There was one sticky request she left us with that was definitely going to put us in the middle of something we didn’t want to be in the middle of . . .

Join me tomorrow for more of Nana Holds.

Evinda