Nana Holds-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Welcome to Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power and welcome back to Nana Holds. Grab your coffee and come on in. We are in the kitchen unloading the dishwasher!

When Bryden first began to help us unload the dishwasher, I didn’t think anything of how he used the actual door as a stepstool to reach all the things he wanted to take out, but as time has gone by, he’s grown so now I’ve got to help him understand why that’s no longer okay. I think the best way is to compliment him on how big and strong he’s become and if he steps on it now, it may break. Speaking of breaking, we have had a couple of mishaps while unloading the dishwasher, so he knows “breaking” something is to be avoided as much as possible.

The first time he broke a crystal glass, we both were so startled by the sound of shattering glass everywhere and when I looked at him, he looked a little scared and simultaneously, panic hit as I realized if he moved in any direction, he was going to step on shards of glass. My voice came out an octave higher than I intended and reached for him and hurriedly scooped him up to avoid him cutting his little feet on the now scattered glass. On the other side of my brain, I’m reminding myself that it’s just a stupid crystal glass and it was definitely an accident, but Bry’s little feelings were already hurt and he began to cry, big giant crocodile tears spilling down his face.

I picked him back up and held him to my heart assuring him that it was an accident and that Nana wasn’t mad. “I just didn’t want you to cut yourself on all the glass.” That seemed to satisfy him. And then I showed him how it had gone everywhere and that Nana needed to vacuum the floor to make sure he didn’t step on any hidden pieces.

Bryden’s response displayed his heart for me to see: “I wanna help you, Nana.” This was one of those times where I truly needed to slow down, grasp for patience and try as hard as I could to see things from his little perspective, which as I write this I realize how foreign that was for me back then but oh, how relieved I am with my whole heart as I acknowledge that I have made great strides of growth in this area.

So as not to burst his good intentions with my lack of understanding, I quickly came to a compromise, telling him he could help me get the vacuum and then Nana would go first and then he could help me. That seemed okay with him, until he saw me begin to vacuum. “Nanna, I do it now?” (I so wish I could play it for you, his sweet tone mixed with a bit of question/begging) to which I would respond, “Almost, buddy, almost,” as I’m scurrying along with the vacuum hose, silently begging the vacuum to do its job and do it quickly!
The good news: we managed to get all the glass vacuumed up without a scrape or a cut!

All these helping-hand moments came in extra handy when it came time to decorate the yard with the fall/harvest decorations. I rewind the camera of my mind and true joy opens the door of my heart and nestles in there bringing a smile to my face. Never has decorating the yard for fall been more fun.

Every piece of yard art brought a different exclamation from him and various expressions that would make even the grumpiest of people smile. Watching him place them where we all decided was just as entertaining and when he would begin to get frustrated with one that wasn’t quite cooperating as he tried to push it into the ground, Papa and Nana were right there to be his helping hand. Oh, the joy of learning to look at things from the eyes of a child . . .

Evinda

Nana Holds From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thanks for joining me today for our Coffee Hour and this life-changing series Nana Holds. It encourages my heart knowing there is you to share it with. As I go out into the world and hear story after story of life happening, my heart hurts over the number of people walking in our very shoes, these shoes that were so uncomfortable at first and needed some serious stretching and breaking in.
Oh, to comfort others with the comfort we’ve been given! Grab your coffee and come on in.

The second week was a bit easier as far as getting into a routine with Bryden, but tougher emotionally as I realized how fragile my husband was. As I look to my journal for a recordation of what was happening, I am shocked at how raw my own emotions were and just how fragile George was, his fragility stretching me beyond my capabilities, causing me to rely on our God more than ever. As I rewind to that period of time, I certainly wouldn’t give me an A in the area of compassion and patience, but I did get a “passing” grade, at least.

We were dealing with raw emotions from all sides and I’m not sure whether it’s fortunate or unfortunate at this point – it felt and still feels unfortunate to us – but Bryden has a lot of family that loves him, including his biological mother, as much as she is capable, and her parents. Talk about issues! So since there isn’t a whole lot that would edify, I’m not going to let anything fly out of my mouth. Maybe someday I’ll have a huge testimony to share when it comes to all of them, but our struggle felt more like major interference as they wanted a piece of little Bry, too! So while we were trying to create some sort of stable environment for him, they were tugging on us, demanding they get to see him too.

As I think about it, all of that struggling led to many good things but the first apparent one was that we realized we were going to have to do something legal in order to protect him and by doing so, we would bring some sort of security to this tough little guy and shield him from others’ craziness and selfishness.

Yes, looking through the second week’s journal entries, the eyes of my heart opened to the reality of the constant threat upon our home and marriage and the cry of my heart was unto Him. I prayed for understanding, strength and a love beyond myself, and His answer often came through this little boy who was now in the habit of saying: “Nana holds,” and soothing my ever-aching soul.

Join me tomorrow for more of this life-changing series,

Evinda

Merry Christmas from our house to yours!

P.S. Join us today for more of breaking free from co-dependency on Blog Talk Radio! www.blogtalkradio.com/Chicklit-Power