Love Thoughts to Ponder-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thank you for joining me for a little coffee break today. I don’t know about you, but little breaks throughout the day go a long way in keeping me going. Since it’s the week of Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d bring some thoughts of love to ponder, thoughts that I have as a result of a passage of scripture I was reading just last week. Grab your coffee and come on in.

So what is “true” love, anyway? I remember when I was younger, when there was many more pieces of junk in my trunk than there are now, chasing it as if it were a butterfly never to be captured…. That is until I ran smack into Jesus by coming to the end of myself. What I mean is He met me where I collapsed and as a matter of fact, it was in my season of singleness! Since then, we’ve unpacked an awful lot of junk, junk that interfered with me truly receiving, let alone honestly giving, that thing called love.

Ever so patiently, He began to show me love in ways that I would understand it and as I become less ensnared by the effects of my past, His love no longer feels elusive, un-imaginable or too hard to comprehend. That’s not to say I’ve arrived when it comes to this powerful force of love, but I feel as though I am getting closer to discovering its depth, purity and honesty that I may bask in it instead of continue to run from it.

See, love is not a feeling, but a choice. True love is not something that gives you butterflies in your stomach, and it is not something that we can actually chase, possess and hold captive. Love is also something we can’t give or even receive on our own.

Now I don’t mean to confuse you, so let me try to clear it up for you with a couple of passages I was reading as I was working in my Becoming a Woman of Freedom Book. This first passage is actually the World’s best kept secret about love:

Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him/her, and he/she in God. And we have known and believed the love that God has for us. God is love and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him/her.

But what if you don’t believe or you just can’t grasp this concept?

Join me Wednesday and I’ll try and answer that transparently!

In His Love,

Evinda


P.S. Join us today at 1:00 PST for our Blog Talk Radio Breaking Free from Co-dependency!

Power Friday @ Chicklit Power

Welcome to our Power Friday at Coffee Hour with Chicklit Power. Grab your coffee and come on in.

When I think about my own recovery from co-dependency, more times than I care to admit, I groan within, wondering if I will ever get it right, ever be free from it. But then He does something in His own sovereign way: splashes me with perspective as I read His Word, or maybe He will use another one of His own to send me a message of encouragement or sometimes, He just gives me a one-liner that catches my attention. That one-liner will run around in my head for a few, travel down to my mouth where I will chew on it a bit, and by the time it reaches my heart to go on down to be digested, I am encouraged and reminded that He who began a new work will be faithful to complete it until the time of Christ Jesus.

See even when I am filled with doubt, He’s still got the brush in His hand, painting on the canvass of my life but I get this picture that He has to splash a different color on what He’s painting to represent that present doubt, but then suddenly mid-stroke, He swooshes and revives my faith and the color changes. It has to because just as the light sends the dark scurrying off, active faith chases doubt away.

Yes, as long as I am showing up, He will continue the painting of my life, one brushstroke at a time, adding more of the color of faith than doubt because as long as I am alive, I will continue to seek Him for true recovery to break free from the chains of do-dependency until I am co-dependent no more – except on Him.

Breaking free,

Evinda

Even When I Fail, He is Faithful-February’s WOW-Part 3

Thanks so much for taking a little coffee break with me today. Grab your coffee and let’s get back to this dilemma of an apparent angry agency owner, two attorneys, and me, the baffled court reporter on the phone with Christie, the office manager for the firm we were working for!

Christie remembered me right away, but we both knew we needed to get right to the problem. She repeated what my office manager had said; that Counsel had set it up. It was obvious she was frustrated as well, and within a few seconds, I could tell this was becoming a blame game but all I wanted to do was solve the problem, find a place for the deposition to take place and take names later. I mean as the minutes are ticking, so is the doctor’s fee, who had just walked in, right smack in the middle of all this.

Suddenly, I had Christie in one ear telling me to talk to Mr. W about getting another conference room and then here comes the agency owner walking like a bull in a china cabinet. In a gruff and demanding tone she says: “I have another business right there. You need to come down here,” and as the reality of her harshness hit me, I was grappling with my other ear, trying to listen to Christie. Apparently, I wasn’t moving  fast enough because she repeated herself! Are you kidding me?

A hot flash threatened to break out and I mentally counted to three as I walked forward. “Christie, I’m so sorry, could you say that again, please? I couldn’t hear you because I’m being scolded and told to move from where I was standing.” What I was really thinking was: you just want to hear my conversation!

About that time here comes the doctor we are supposed to depose. As he walks toward me he hears the angry agency owner who apparently didn’t like the word “scolded” so she proceeded to turn her back on me and announce to all of us that she wasn’t scolding me; she has another business she’s trying to run.

Well, I could go all day about suppositions and accusations, but I won’t because two wrongs don’t make a right. I got off the phone with Christie, shook the doctor’s hand. He smiled at me and lifted his eyebrows as if to say, “What in the world …” He did say, “I’ll be right back,” and he walked into her office.

In the meantime, I told both attorneys I’d see about using a conference room from my friend’s agency if they wanted to. My client voiced his appreciation and said let’s see what the doctor says.
A few minutes later the doctor came out and announced we were driving to downtown Claremont to his friends’ office who was also an attorney. And then here she came to make her final announcement, not an apology, an announcement. She began to reiterate her policies but what she said next really pushed a button. With me standing directly across from her, she said, as if I wasn’t there: “Your court reporter said I was scolding her and I wasn’t scolding her. I was merely asking her to move so my other business wasn’t bothered.

I interrupted her and in a calm but firm voice I said: “Excuse me. You don’t have to talk about me as if I’m not here. I am standing right in front of you.”
“Well, I wasn’t scolding you,” she retorted.

My voice suddenly raised about a half octave from before: “Yes, you did. Listen to your tone right now. Why do you have to be so mean?” I turned my back, caught my client’s eyes, and the doctor’s and began to walk down the hall. I was so overwhelmed with what had just happened. Never in 22 years of reporting had I come across any agency owner like that. The most important thing was to get the deposition taken, for the sake of the doctor and the two attorneys, not just our client.
I was shaken up to say the least, and as the picture comes to life once again and I look at it from the outside in, I can learn from it and recognize these things:

1. When dealing with an unreasonable person, do not expect anything but unreasonableness.
2. When I engage with an unreasonable person, I only add a huge log to the fire which will now threaten to burn out of control.
3. My opinions, my expectations born out of my flesh cannot change that unreasonable person.
4. And lastly, I do not need to use my opinions and expectations to defend myself for though my flesh and my heart fail, God will continue to be the strength of my heart and my portion forever!

Incidentally, we did get the deposition completed and the doctor admitted that he had never seen her behave like that before. He even apologized for her, calling her behavior uncalled for, and then he added: Maybe she was just having a bad day! Ugh, more salt to flavor this lesson! The next morning in my quiet time, as I was working in my “Becoming a Woman of Freedom” study, I came upon this verse! God is so faithful, even when my flesh and heart fail!

Make it a great day!

Evinda

February 6th, 2013 Even When I Fail, He is Faithful-February’s Wow Part 2

Thanks so much for taking the time to join me for a little break at Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power. Grab your coffee and come on in. I have a bit of real-life drama to share with you that He is using to refine me. I pray that as I share, the sparks from the refining process will ignite something spiritually significant for you!

I had received my job assignment the night before – I am a freelance court reporter — and as soon as I heard the location, there was a little nudge of uneasiness in my spirit. See, the job was at another court reporting agency, and in court reporting etiquette, a court reporter from one agency does not show up to report a deposition at another court reporting agency, unless it’s a network job. I squashed the uneasiness down, telling myself to chillax. At least I was working.

The other disconcerting thing is it was in a bad part of town, downtown Pomona off of Garey Avenue. As I pulled up, I was a bit shocked at how rundown the building looked and how hard I had to look for their sign to make sure I was at the right place. If I had to compare it to something, I’d say it looked more like a bar instead of a professional building. That’s what I love about my job; all the culture I experience!

Anyway, I walked in, and the inside looked about as bad as the outside, dark, dungy and a bit oppressive now that I think about it. The lady at the front was in what looked like a cage, or a barricade, probably for safety reasons! She must have seen me pulling my court reporting case because she didn’t even greet me; she just directed me down the hall, “straight ahead, then turn right.”

As I turned right, I saw one attorney sitting down and a lady standing at the door of her office and I could tell immediately by her body language and her tone of voice she was using with this attorney that something was wrong. I sat like a fly on the wall for a moment to listen to the obvious problem and then I heard: “I never heard anything about this. The only time we allow another court reporter that isn’t from our agency to report in our conference room is if it’s a network job.”
I mentally flew off the wall and joined the conversation: “Actually, I think this may be a network job.”

Like a snake that suddenly came upon some unsuspecting prey, she turned her head toward me and spat: “No, it isn’t a network job. All network jobs go through me.”

As I wiped her venom off  of me, I looked at the other attorney and calmly said: Let me call my office. I stepped down the hall a few steps and called my office manager and after putting me on hold for a few seconds, she came back on and explained that our client had arranged it. Then she informed me that she had Christie, the office manager for our client’s firm on the line.

When I heard her say “Christie,” I got excited because I didn’t know she was still with this firm and we go a long way back to when we used to sell Creative Memories together and do scrap-booking. In fact, she’s the one who got me started in that fun hobby. I knew we couldn’t get in a “remember when” conversation; no, that would have to be for another day . . .

Join me tomorrow for more of this real life blooper that led me to these words of wisdom!

Evinda

Nana Holds!

Thanks so much for joining me for a little break today at Coffee Hour. Grab your coffee and come on in.

As the days passed and we got into “our” routine again, I began to relax a bit with him, and he with me. I realized that God would reveal whatever the “something keeping me from something” was, but it would come easier if I didn’t let it rent so much space in my head as that would take me away from what He’s actually trying to accomplish in me and through me as I learn to put into action all the things I’ve learned and put to rest all that I’ve unlearned!

See, with the visits to others, potty-training was sort of put on hold so with no immediate visit away from home for at least three weeks, I began to give this chore a lot more dedication and yet, I was learning not to be so serious at the same time.

I’m not sure how the subject came up, but I’m pretty sure it was in the midst of another accident, and this one was a poopy one and George was the lucky one on cleanup at that moment! In his frustration, he brought up big boy school came and told him, “How am I going to take you to big boy school if you keep pooping your pants?”

Well that little seed must have resonated in Bryden’s head and it didn’t take long to root. He kept talking about big boy school. I mean the concept totally got his attention and let me tell you, we took that tool and ran with it as if it were the last football to touch the 100 yard line! Although we did look a bit dorky as we still weren’t quite so sure what we were doing and how we were doing it!

I’d tell him each morning, Bryden’s gonna go to big boy school and Nana and Papa are going to get you a big-boy backpack and a big boy lunch pail. His eyes would get real wide — and he has the most expressive and big brown eyes! And I just love the way he’d repeat it, his pronunciation of “big” incredibly heart-warming as he emphasized his the “b,” nearly sputtering every time because he said it so hard.

And then we’d have a discussion on what type of backpack he wanted for big boy school, and the lunch pail had to match. He was torn between Spiderman, Superman and Sponge Bob and I assured him that when the time came and he was going potty in the toilet all by himself, we’d go and get that backpack and matching lunch pail.

Join me more potty-training praises tomorrow!

Joyfully

Evinda

Nanna Holds -Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thanks so much for joining me today for a little break. I enjoy having Coffee Hour with you and sharing this powerful series, Nana Holds. Grab your coffee and come on in.

So as we pull into our garage, his sad little voice pulls me out of my emotional tug-of-war: “We’re home.” Those were the sweetest words I’d heard all day, and they went a long way in soothing my troubled soul and pulling me out of and away from these unfamiliar emotions that were bringing a lot of questions to the surface of my mind. At least he still considered this home, I thought.

Sparky was pretty excited to see little Bryden; but the little princess Baraka, now called Baraka-Evinda, was standing back, still not adjusted to having to share our affections, and therefore, not really a fan of little Bryden , yet. We began to make our way into the laundry room, me behind him, but he didn’t want me to hold him; rather, he wanted to walk in all by himself.

I brought in all of his stuff while he sat on the floor with his blanket and his new book, turning the page once in a while, captivated by the voice of the one he just left, the one he had bonded with as though she were mommy.

I busied myself with putting all his stuff away, the stuff he left with and now more new stuff from his Grandma, Papa, and Tauntie Bre! This child wants for nothing; trust me, at least materially speaking! As I put his clothes away and his new toys, and a new hat, and slippers, too, the emotional wrestling match continued on in my mind and traveled into my heart. On one hand I was so grateful that God had surrounded this little guy with many people who love him so much and I was and continue to be amazed at how resilient he is, though I question how long that will last. And that’s not being pessimistic; just realistic.

I was also grateful that just when we needed it most, there was someone to take him for a couple days, or a week, and extend to us a bit of a break. As I write this, the emotional tug-of-war reveals one rope, the rope of guilt for needing a break. His other grandma always says she would take him to live with her; in fact, she wants that very much and cries every time she leaves him, but she knows that his daddy needs to be able to see him and be daddy to him as much as is possible for his recovery and restoration.

Another huge rope in this emotional tug-of-war is coming to the surface, though I can’t quite make out its purpose, its definition and why it keeps wrapping around my heart and mind causing me anguish, bringing questions to the surface more and more consistently so much so that I know I will one day have to answer them after going deeper with Him!
Join me next week for more of this revealing season of Nana Holds!
Evinda

Invitation Tuesdays at Coffee Hour with Chickilt Power

Thanks for joining me today for another Invitation Tuesday. Grab your coffee and come on in.

I am so excited about how this event is coming to life and the things He is revealing to me about relationships! I had no idea that there was still so much for me to learn, so much for me to let go of in order to experience all that was intended in relationships and the crazy thing about it is He’s using relationships to reveal these things to me, as well as something else which I’ll reveal to you at the workshop!

He’s also already given me the opening for this event and I can hardly think about it without crying! So, mark your calendars and bring some tissues to wipe those happy tears!


Looking forward to sharing with you all He’s beend ownloading into my mind and heart,

Evinda

Nanna Holds -Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thank you so much for joining me for a little coffee break at Coffee Hour! Grab your coffee and come on in for a few minutes.

I left off with Bryden’s daddy’s graduation from the first phase of his program. I am returning there because there were a couple of poignant moments I want to try and recapture for you. Bryce was sitting in the row ahead of us with the other guys who were also graduating and we were right behind him. Well, Bryden had found a nice big piano which kept him entertained for a few minutes, marveling at the concept of pushing a key down and it makes a noise sometimes pretty and soemitimes… well, not so pleasing to the ear! Soon he wasn’t content with that. He wanted to sit with his daddy. So down he went and up he climbed, announcing as if no one else were in the room that he wanted to sit on his daddy’s lap. All this was happening while one of the directors was welcoming us all to the graduation.

Hmmm, what to do? Pick him up and take him out and cause an even bigger stink, or just let him be and see if he would settle down? This question went around in my head while a hot flash trickled down my back!

Just about the time I was going to reach for him, the director asked us to stand. I watched Bryce stand with his little boy in his arms and it was as though they were one. With his head on his daddy’s shoulder and a one-of-a-kind look of contentment on his face, he clung to his daddy. It was the sweetest picture of a little boy hanging on to his daddy, eyes sweetly closed, an angelic look on his face that comes with contentment, when all else is right with the world because of who you’re with.

The director began to pray, and Bryden let us know he was listening with a resounding “Amen” at the end. The sound of laughter erased my prior question, at least for the time being, and we sat down to listen as the director explained what the graduates had to do to get where they were today.

Then we got to hear from each of the graduates as they gave a quick testimony of what being in the program had done for them thus far. I just knew George was practically holding his breath waiting to see his son stand up in front of a crowd and speak, no matter what he said or how he said it, because George’s greatest fear is speaking in front of others. In fact, he has warned me to never invite him up to the stage to speak at one of our events.

Bryce didn’t disappoint and delivered quite well, even making us laugh through the tears as he shared the sovereignty of how God had intervened in his life just in time and how he just wanted to concentrate on getting healthy and learn how to have a relationship with this God he had been running from , the one his dad had been trying to introduce him to for years.

That’s when the final poignant moment of this day happened, when I recognized the elation I was feeling was similar to when my own son had stood before us and declared his commitment to sobriety, and to God. God was blending our family, one child at a time and I couldn’t have been more proud of him if he were my biological son!

Join me Wednesday for more!

Smiling,

Evinda

Power Friday From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Welcome and thanks for stopping by Coffee Hour for Power Friday. Grab your coffee and come on in.

So if you’re new to our Power Fridays, let me just share with you, these “power” thoughts are actually revelations that I’m receiving as I break free from co-dependency, which is happening at a slow, slow rate, but nevertheless it is happening! To God be the glory for the tools and people He is using to help me in this process, namely Steve Atkinson, my co-host on Blog Talk Radio.

Anyway, this power thought came to me just last week and is a great reminder that co-dependency is rooted in fear and anxiety and when we learn to recognize that, we can gain a bit of momentum in fighting this viral infection off. I hope it helps you and feel free to pass this on to your friends . . .

Is someone or something pushing your anxiety button? Answer it with prayer!

Less anxious,

Evinda

Nana Holds-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thank you for joining me today for a little break. Grab your coffee and come on in, away from the distractions and pulls on you!

The first week was probably the hardest for many reasons but the main one was the overwhelming reality of the responsibility of Bryden, how to protect him from the choices that his parents had made while convincing him everything in his world hadn’t changed. But it had and I consistently reminded myself that our God had brought us to this situation and HE would carry us through with or without our trust so I may as well lean on and in Him so as to gain all the revelations along the way.

Bryden’s world isn’t the only one that had changed. His papa’s world changed dramatically and he had a hard time hiding the sadness. That was probably what weighed heavier on and in my heart then the reality of the responsibility of a toddler and having to start over raising a child. Day after day I watched my husband age with the burden of sadness.

Each morning I’d hear his steps as he walked across the bathroom floor, heavy, heavy, heavy, and it wasn’t until several days later that I realized that something was missing: He was no longer singing in the shower like he used to. That may sound funny in a weird way to you but I can remember the first years of our marriage, how he always sang worship songs in the shower and whenever it stopped, I then would know that he had a heavy heart. Well, this was definitely one of those seasons.
Just a little detour: Ladies, if you are married, pay attention to the little things that your guy does that make you smile and appreciate him for them.

Because George’s world had changed, my world had changed. Watching him wait for the daily phone call from my stepson, his son, was also incredibly painful, but when the call finally came, some of the tension released. The first ray of hope came that first week with that first phone call that I answered and I’ll never, ever forget it. George wasn’t home so I got to talk with him for a couple of minutes and it was in this conversation that my stepson told me something he had never told me in the eight-plus years I’ve been married to his dad: He told me he loved me and how sorry he was; he then went on to acknowledge, “You’ve been like a mom to me and… I’m so sorry. I love you, Kim.”


My heart stopped long enough to soak up those words and I had no idea they would mean so very much, as if I had waited all this time for them. As I hung up the phone, I felt that spark of hope ignite within me again reminding me that He who works all things together for good was and is and always will be sovereign and in control.

Humbly,

Evinda

Nana Holds From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Welcome to Coffee Hour and thanks so much for having coffee with me! Grab your coffee and come on in for more of this transparent series, Nana Holds! We have just a few hours before Bryden gets home and finds out his daddy won’t be coming home.

I think I understand what the term “auto pilot” means now because that’s what it felt like for the rest of the day. I did what I had to do and didn’t even remember doing it. It was like my body was there, but my mind and heart were looking up and waiting for the next instruction.

The funny thing is, through a series of silent instructions, more of the pieces of the painful puzzle of my step-son’s life appeared in the picture, bringing clarity which brought understanding. And though the pain was intense, especially for my husband, understanding went a long way in soothing it.
And while I did look for some eternal value immediately, I must confess I wasn’t happy. In fact, the more reality settled into my head about all the sacrificing required for this situation, the more I resembled Bryden in one of his fits, on my back, kicking and screaming. Oh, was I ever unlearned with it comes to not acting out of control despite my world feeling out of control!

Daddy Holds!

George came home and my heart broke for him. Not only was he in extreme emotional pain, but he was in a tremendous amount of physical pain as well. Stress has a way of doing that, pinching nerves, and manifesting itself in all kinds of hideous ways and by the time he had come home, he could barely move his head to the left because of a pinched nerve!

We had talked several times throughout the day, so he was aware of the many answers to the many unasked questions, but honestly, he was aging before my eyes. I tried to comfort him as best as I could, reminding him that God definitely had intervened in our son’s life, and the only way to go from this point was up, if he chose to do so. I felt in my gut then, and still do now, that God was going to use this tragedy for Bryce’s triumph in a way that only He could.


My hubby wasn’t able to see that right away though, or maybe he could, but it wasn’t at the forefront of his thoughts. No, his heart ached, longing to pull his son out of the murky waters he had put himself in and protect him from the ramifications from his own choices. Oh, did I ever feel his pain and I so wished I could take it  from him, but I have been through this before and I understand that while it is incredibly painful, that this is/was something we were going to have to walk through together and I was truly thankful he didn’t have to go through it alone.

Shortly after George came home, Suzanne brought Bryden home. It’s a blur, exactly what we did first, but I think we just played with him for a little while before dinner. I think I was still sort of on auto pilot. It wasn’t until we were sitting down for dinner that the question finally came, the one I had been anticipating and trying not to dread . . .

Join me tomorrow for more.

Evinda

Nana Holds-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Welcome to Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power and thanks for joining me for a little break. I’m excited to be back with this series, Nana Holds. Grab your coffee and come on in!

Just to recap, we left off with me transparently sharing about the perception I have of myself as it relates to children, which has been fairly negative, and I hinted that I thought God would be using little Bryden to change that perception. And then I think I closed the last post in this series with a confession: that my attitude was definitely changing for the better, and I was beginning to be more comfortable with this little two-year-old in our home and not look so much like him when he is throwing a fit!

But then something happened that literally changed all of our worlds. On June 8th, we received a phone call that changed our family dynamic, and was, to put it mildly, a family crisis that left our little grandson Bryden without a daddy for an unknown period of time. I remember feeling a sense of relief because I knew that our Father had brought the truth to the light and that though the days ahead would be tough, this was a new beginning for my stepson.

Daddy Holds!

That relief was short-lived because later that day, a terror-like feeling gripped me, nearly choking me as the gravity of the reality hit: George and I were now to be parents to this little two-year-old. As I stood there in the silence, I began to try and think through all that this meant, but I couldn’t wrap my brain around it in that moment. Though I could see some eternally-valued things, I couldn’t hold on to the eternal perspective. It was just too much for me in my flesh.

My world, as I knew it, was coming to an abrupt stop; everything about it required redirection for now it was really no longer all about me and my agenda, “my ministry,” but all about a two-year-old and his little soul. This was going to require more of me and yet less of me at the same time for there was no way I could do this in my own strength.
Finally, I began to think about someone else besides myself: little Bryden. As I anticipated him looking for his daddy.

Later that evening, around dinner time, I fell to my knees, the tears coming from the depth of my soul. “Whatever am I going to tell him when he asks where his daddy is?” This is what I heard:
“Tell him he’s at a new job, the biggest job of his life.”

With a strength that was not in me or of me, I stood and embraced the rest of the day, rehearsing the words given to me while on my knees.

Join me tomorrow for Bryden’s response.

Evinda

Am I A Stone Thrower-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thanks so much for joining me today for a little break at Coffee Hour! This is our final WOW, Words of Wisdom and Weapons of Warfare for 2012. My eyes are watering as I write this! Where did the year go? It’s almost time for me to reflect on it all with Him and make goals to press on in the journey that I may be more like Him in my words and actions. Oops, enough about me! Grab your coffee and come on in.

This month’s WOW comes from a series I’ve just wrapped up called The Adulterous Woman and our Words of Wisdom come from John 8:7b. Before I get to the actual WOW, allow me to share a truth within the Word which is singing in my heart and ringing in my ears right now. As I reflect on it, I must confess that it has proven to be true over and over in my life.

Have you ever heard of the scripture that says that the Word is sharper than a two-edged sword? Well, let me tell you these words found in our WOW aim straight to the heart and have the power to explode like the most beautiful array of fireworks you have ever seen. And while the sparks may take years to settle down, they will be leaving an impression that will never leave your mind or your heart. See, a two-edged sword is double the power, cutting in while cutting away!

I can’t help but think of several friends who have some different theological beliefs when it comes to Jesus and how to get to heaven and obviously their beliefs are a mixture of their own life’s experiences as well as others’ opinions which helped formed their own. My heart longs to show and share so many scriptures with them, and yet, the best way to do that is to share how they have come alive in my life, cutting into my heart while cutting away the lies I’ve bought into. That’s when you feel as though you could really tie some super-strong knots in your string of faith!

In our society, we tend to judge a book by its cover or point fingers at others’ indiscretions, lifestyles and/or shortcomings, and basically seduce others with our prideful opinions. In the short story of the adulterous woman found in the book of John, Jesus gives us one of the most powerful and shortest lessons about this very subject to the thousands gathered in the Temple. The Pharisees brought this woman straight to Jesus during the Feast to see how He would punish her.

The crowd watched and waited for Jesus to speak, and I’m sure some even held their breath in anticipation, but what happened next was nothing that they expected. I so wish I could have been a fly on the wall or been in the pocket of one of those Pharisees or religious leaders to see their expression at Jesus’ response to their accusations.

Jesus didn’t say anything at first. Instead, in response to their angry and accusatory words, Jesus simply bent down and began to write on the ground with His finger, almost as if He didn’t even hear them, or maybe He was just tuning them out. I can’t help but wonder what He was writing, but let’s stay in the WOW.

When they continued asking Him, He acknowledged them by standing, ever so slowly. He then looked out to the crowd and spoke confidently the shortest lesson ever taught. Here are the fifteen words that definitely act as a two-edged sword: “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.”

We don’t need to know the beginning or the ending of that true story to get what Jesus said to those gathered at the Temple. His message was pointedly clear then and its powerful meaning has not decreased or changed. His message wasn’t limited to those gathered there that day in the Temple, or just for the people of that generation. No, that is why these Words of Wisdom made it into the Bible, for these words have the power to keep the stone out of our hand and prevent our hearts from turning to stone that we may not be stone-throwers but grace-givers.

Not without sin,

Evinda

Power Friday From Chicklit Power

Thanks for joining me for Power Friday @ Chicklit Power. Grab your coffee and come on in.

I was listening to a song called Undone by Mercy Me the other day and the words drew me in so deeply, I had to press replay twice! It starts out: “No apologies for whom I meant to be. The only thing that matters is I am meant to be free. When I am overwhelmed, holding pieces of my heart, when I feel my world start to fall apart, to the Cross I run, holding high my chains undone. Now I am finally free, free to be what I’ve become, undone!”

See, I’m realizing that the more undone from co-dependency I become, the more the walls of conflict seem to rise before me, and one by one, I must take the Father’s hand and allow Him to lead me to them and either through them or up and over them. In the meantime, the chaos that freedom seems to be causing can be incredibly overwhelming, threatening to take my peace but I must press on, ultimately co-dependent with no one but my Heavenly Father, the one who has freed me from the tangled traps that the ropes of co-dependency tie.

Join me in celebrating becoming “Undone.”

Free to be what I’ve become,

Evinda

Dancing with the Butterfly-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thanks so much for joining me today for a little break. I have a fun story to share with you so grab your coffee and come on in for a bit.

Just a couple of weeks ago, my assistant and I were in Texas at the C.S. Lewis Writers’ retreat and when I got a chance to take a break, we went exploring the sights around the camp in search of nature’s beauty so she could capture it with her camera. Walking up the hill was invigorating and calming at the same time. It was such a peaceful place full of woodsy-type smells, the sound of whispering branches as the wind rustled through them, birds talking off in the distance, and other creatures, too. At one point we even saw a deer saunter across the road and take off in the forest of trees.

Suddenly something sort of whimsical caught my attention, its colors dancing before my eyes, teasing me and taunting me to follow it in flight. It was a beautiful butterfly. As I watched it traverse the air just in front of us, almost as if it was showing off, I was mesmerized. The little beauty pulled me out of my trance when it landed on the ground just in front of us.

I started to move toward it ever so slowly and motioned for Jocelyn to join me so she could capture this beautiful butterfly who had its wings wide open, in all its glory, as if he was showing off. She got one picture but as she crouched down beside me and  got the camera focused, the little bugger shut his wings and then after a pause, took flight again.

We stood and watched it, expecting it to just fly away, but instead, it flew around us and around us and toward us and then away from us and then back toward us. This went on for a couple of minutes and suddenly, in my gut, I realized this butterfly was wanting to dance and if it had a voice, I could only imagine the joyful laughter we may have heard coming from this beautiful creature and the pleas for us to join him for some playful dancing.

I lost count of how many times we danced with the butterfly, stopping when he did, bending down to try and capture him with his wings wide open displaying his colorful splendor and each time we would get just right, and Jocelyn would get ready to click and smack! Wings shut, he would sit there for a pause, probably laughing at us, and then he’d get up and take flight again.

It made me think of the pursuit of happiness, how just when we think we’ve arrived, bam! Here comes heartache, trouble, trials and our happiness takes flight again. And then unannounced, it returns, flittering and fluttering, tempting and teasing us to reach out and grasp at it just one more time because for sure this time we’ll catch it only to have it intercepted with life’s disappointments and troubles.

This happened enough to where we thought we’d never get the shot so we began to walk the way we came and as I turned around, my mouth came open in disbelief; he was following us! At one point he came so close to my face I jerked backwards in my reflexes. We were back in the dance, falling for his tricks when he would land on the ground with his wings wide open only to shut them when we were ready to take a picture.

Suddenly I got an idea and picked up a leaf. I stood up and held my arm straight out with the leaf in between my index finger and my thumb. “Be still and see if he comes,” I told Jocelyn. It wasn’t thirty seconds and suddenly, there he was, perched on the leaf in my hand looking right at me. Happiness bubbled up inside me and I could barely contain myself, but I did. I stayed right there, in the happiness of the moment before he took flight again!

Oh that we would stay in the moments filled with happiness, soaking up the laughter they bring, not worrying about it going away, or about tomorrow for that moment is what we have here and now.

Joyfully,

Evinda
 

The Adulterous Woman-Conclusion! From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thank you for joining me for your coffee break today at Chicklit Power. Grab your coffee and let’s get back to you, me and The Adulterous Woman.
Jesus has just spoken fifteen words that create one of the most important lessons we as Christians desperately need to learn. Basically, He’s beat the prideful Pharisees and religious leaders at their attempt to have Him arrested, but no trickery was involved on His part.

Now, at this point, the adulterous woman is sitting on the ground, “in the midst” the scriptures say and I found this painting of her online that I must share with you that captures her so beautifully.



Though there is nothing in the book of John suggesting that her hand was outstretched, all I have to do is close my eyes and put myself in The Adulterous Woman’s place, and this is exactly what I would do, especially after hearing such words of conviction! I would reach my hand out just like this and I probably wouldn’t be able to keep my conviction quiet, either as I begged for mercy and tears stream down my face!

After Jesus spoke, He stooped back down and the Scriptures go on to confirm that those who heard Him, indeed their conscience convicted them and they left the Temple one by one. No one remained except Jesus and The Adulterous Woman. But wait! How interesting is this? Now she’s standing. Can you imagine the disbelief she stood in, mixed with relief? Something tells me her recognition has fully dawned and she realizes she’s looking at her Savior.

Then Jesus raises Himself back up and said to her: “Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?” And she replies, “No one, Lord.” Jesus thereafter voices His forgiveness of her sins and encourages her to go and sin no more.

Wow! All I can say is HE is the only one with that power and authority to forgive the adulterous woman, aka, you and me. Only He has the videotape of my heart and yours, or any other adulterous woman’s for that matter, and He is who we all will answer to. May we learn to be less and less like the Pharisees and more and more like the forgiven adulterous woman clothed now in humility!

Thanks so much for sticking with me in this series. I hope you can join me tomorrow for a new mini-series called Dancing with a Butterfly.

Humbly,

Evinda

The Adulterous Woman-From Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power

Thanks so much for taking time out of your day to come have coffee with me! Grab your coffee and come on in. We are about to receive one of the most important lessons Jesus ever taught with the least amount of words!

So it’s almost as if the Pharisees and religious leaders are taunting Jesus, wanting to hear how He’s going to respond to the Law given by God to/through Moses. They were as confident that they had trapped Him in their trickery as I am that the son is going to shine tomorrow.

All eyes are on Jesus, and I’m sure some are even holding their breath in anticipation, wondering how He will respond to this dilemma and if He was/is really the Savior. Jesus didn’t disappoint them; that’s for sure! All eyes and ears on Him, He bends down and begins to write on the ground with His finger.

While they all watch in disbelief, I am positive that it is still pretty quiet but I bet the mind of the adulterous woman is speaking all kinds of things, beginning with her recognition for a need of the Savior. I wonder if she could read, and if she could, she knew what He wrote, or had a good idea because she was down on the ground, bent down with shame, not to be confused with humility.

The Pharisees become impatient and begin to ask Him all over again, as if Jesus hadn’t heard them before. Jesus continues to write, and I’m sure the adulterous woman is silently pleading for forgiveness. I wonder if this is when her God-shaped hole suddenly opened up in recognition of her need of a Savior. I know mine would be opening about now, if not beforehand!

Finally, and slowly, Jesus stands to give His answer to these Pharisees and religious leaders perched on pride, an answer of fifteen words that captures one of the most important lessons we as Christ-followers need to let sear on our heart and live out in our lives. And what I love about this answer is HE actually stumped those who came to trick Him so they could arrest Him. I can just see Him scanning the crowd before He speaks, and His eyes coming to rest on those deceived, His voice calm, controlled and confident and He says: “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.”

Isn’t that a response to get you thinking?

Join me tomorrow for the conclusion to The Adulterous Woman.

Evinda