Coffe Hour @ Chicklit Power: Rewrite Loving the Unlovable

Loving the Unlovable

Step 1

Coffee Hour @ Chicklit Power...

Thanks for joining me today, a new day to revel in His mercies, so we can extend some to others, especially those unlovable difficult people in our lives. And if you don’t have one of those right now, store this information for later because we all, at one time or another, run into them Grab your coffee and let’s get started.

At the end of every year, and before the new one begins, I have a habit/tradition that I practice and it is to write down my goals for the upcoming New Year. This goal setting doesn’t happen all in one sitting, if you will; rather, it takes several and I pray in between. I divide my goals up into two categories: spiritual/personal and then monetary. You may be wondering, what in the world is a “spiritual” or “personal” goal so I’ll share a few of mine with you. For example, last year, I wanted to do a 40-day word fast. That was a spiritual goal.

It is easier if the goal involves just you and God and is not contingent upon someone else's actions. For example, one goal I’ve had is to initiate reading the Bible with my husband more often. Well, if he doesn’t want to read it, does that mean I fail in my goal? No, as long as I initiate, that’s the key.

Monetary goals are pretty simple: anything that costs more than $100 – or you pick an amount -- and is not within your normal budget.

So a few years back, I had reached a point in my life, physically and spiritually, where I had become very aware of the necessity to love the unlovable/difficult people in my life as well as the people that I was    convinced didn’t love me. What brought me to this awareness? Well,           probably a combination of things, because everything worthwhile just
seems to be a process for me but the final light in my head and heart turned on when one of my sisters died by drinking herself to death! I’ll never forget the taste of anger that rose in my throat as I watched my alcoholic      mother during the memorial. I was so shaken by the revelation of unresolved anger in me towards her and when it hit me in the face with a           The Book that Began
force barely unrecognizable, I knew I couldn’t let it go untamed.                               the Journey!

My sister’s life and her death helped me realize that when my life is over and I stand before our Father, He’s not going to ask me how so and so treated me. No, He is going to talk to me about me and how I treated them, how I loved them despite them.

So that was the year that on my personal/spiritual side of the goals I wrote, “Get better at loving” . . . and I listed the names. That’s right; I said “list”! It’s hard to admit but there were several on my list. Let me tell you, it’s a powerful experience to list them, visualize their faces and officially hold yourself accountable to love the unlovable.

This is the first step. May I challenge you to do the same? You don’t have to wait for the New Year, because the sooner you start, the lighter your load will be, which means less junk you will be carrying in your own emotional trunk. And for those who have been with me since the beginning, let's do this again, together! Go ahead, get your pen and be still for a few minutes and think; then journal the name or names of those unlovable and/or difficult people in your life.

Encouraging you,

Evinda