Monday, June 6, 2016

Jenn's Journey

Ah...summer vacation is here…for the kids at least! In our house we are looking forward to sleeping in and no homework. I remember how happy I always was when summer break came. Being a kid is so simple…or is it? Grab a cup of coffee and join me.
I've been reflecting on aging recently. Not the getting old part but the getting wiser part. I can honestly say that I am enjoying the 40's more than any other decade. Other than missing the energy I had in the past, I wouldn't go back if offered the chance!
My daughter is finishing up first grade this year. It's been interesting to watch how what others think affects her. She has recently decided that we are poor! Why? Because we don't have an elevator in our house and she doesn't see me spending money every chance I get. I find this somewhat amusing, yet sad. The act of comparing to others starts so young and it seems worse for girls. I know you understand what I mean. Clothes, relationships, friendships, money…all ways we feel the need to ask, "Do I measure up to her?"
 I've spent far too much of my life comparing myself to others. Years ago, in grade school, I recall a friend saying how glad she was that she is not as ugly as I am. That hurt, of course, but it also planted a competitive seed in my heart. As I look back now, I realize her saying this was more about her insecurities than it was about my looks. I now know that that friendship was not healthy on many levels, but that's a topic for another blog!  
Perspective comes with age. For me, the 40's have been about letting go of thought patterns that no longer work for me.

Let me share something I’ve recently read from Brene’ Brown, author/psychologist:
"All of this pretending and performing – these coping mechanisms that you’ve developed to protect yourself from feeling inadequate and getting hurt – have to go. Your armor is preventing you from growing into your gifts. I understand that you needed these protections when you were small. I understand that you believed your armor could help you secure all of the things you needed to feel worthy of love and belonging, but you’re still searching and you’re more lost than ever. Time is growing short. There are unexplored adventures ahead of you. You can’t live the rest of your life worried about what other people think. You were born worthy of love and belonging. Courage and daring are coursing through you. You were made to live and love with your whole heart. It’s time to show up and be seen.''
 It's very freeing to come into our own, and it's a choice we all have as we grow. I am reminded of 1 Corinthians 13:11 "When I was a child, I talked like a child; I thought like a child; I reasoned like a child. When I became a woman, I put the ways of childhood behind me." 
Until next week, be blessed,

Jenn

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